Last month people were afraid to expect another flood in Jakarta as we neared my cousin’s wedding.

Who knows a month on, it’s the COVID-19 that’s the crisis faced all over the world!

Crisis, but normal

The current COVID-19 gets everyone’s attention because of its scale and very visible impacts on pretty much everything now, but I think people have been experiencing the kind of anxiety that COVID-19 creates much the time all over the world on a personal level. We who are sheltered just aren’t aware of them until we’re also affected.

Even in Jakarta where I expect quite a comfortable living, last month Mom told me about what happened due to the flood and blackout a few months ago. We have our own power generator at home which runs on fuel, so when it’s low, they drove out in search of fuel. Mom and bro in the car driving along empty, dark and flooded streets. That sounded a bit scary to me. And yes, they were afraid too then, who knows what possibly awaits them? You may be attacked in quiet places like that.

But you need the fuel for power – next door auntie also came to use our electricity because they don’t keep their own generator. Mom also said the market was then empty, and that luckily she managed to quickly buy some eggs to keep as emergency food supply.

I remember telling her, ‘It sounds like you’re living in a third world country!’ (It surprised me as Indonesia is a developing country, it’s after all Jakarta the capital city, and the family is quite comfortable financially). Who would know in a month’s time, here I am in Melbourne, first world country where people are also emptying out the supermarket shelves and in full gear of getting ready for an apocalypse!

 

Apart from the varied crisis happening to many people daily everywhere, there’s also personal life crisis happening to many individuals all over.

Last month Mom and I also talked about one of my aunties whose son died years ago, followed by her dear 20 yr old grandson everyone loved (due to cancer), and then recently she lost a second son to stroke. That’s for sure far worse to face than what people generally feel they’re facing in the current COVID-19 situation.

Then we also talked about other long standing family issues such as this cousin who’s now out of rehab, etc.

As has been, it is true as said in ancient times,

.. man is born to trouble as the sparks fly upward.

Job 5:7

Having said that, it is by no means hopeless. In fact, there is every reason for hope (and good reasons) according to the Christian worldview. So much so you won’t believe until you know it for yourself.

But I digress. Back to my cousin’s wedding..

Wedding business

I learnt that in Indo, to marry you both have to be of the same religion! On paper anyway.

Which means, they need to get that done on document if they’re of different faith. As my cousin is a Christian (on paper she’s a Buddhist) and her then-fiance is also one, she had to get hers changed. And to be a Christian on paper, you have to produce a baptism cert. So there’s a whole business of making money out of baptism certs (and of other religions requirements) for couples who are trying to get married but have different religions on paper.

I had no idea about that.. Interesting.

Wedding triviality

Before my trip back, I had been reminded a few times to bring something presentable i.e., dress to wear. When I was back in Jakarta, Mom asked to go shopping and I found out it’s not for her, she wanted me to buy something for myself instead and we went to a number of different malls and individual boutiques. ‘All of those, nothing you want?’

‘No.’

Either too expensive or impractical.  In my opinion, the worst of all is a store called Meiji.  It’s a clothing store originated from Medan.  I don’t appreciate the way they plagiarise branded names. 

Anyway, as we were in the store lift going up, one of the Medanese aunties (deduced from the distinctive Medan Hokkien accent) turned to the mirror behind her to study her face and suddenly exclaimed in horror, ‘Sii lohhh… wa eh pek thau mo chut lai liao!’*  It did make me feel like I was in Medan, for I remember it’s that accent that coaxed people into buying insurance.  May be not just Medan, but that’s what I’ve seen and heard of, their insurance companies sell you what you don’t need by making people feel bad.  In buying, it’s about ‘giving face’ / ‘helping a friend’, but there’s only that many you can sell that way, you can’t keep replicating it.

*(in Hokkien dialect) oh nooo.. my gray hair has grown!

But I digress again!

The aunties talked about hairdo and make-up arrangement. Personally I am often shocked by the results of what looks ridiculously captivating for the wrong reasons. This time one auntie asked if Mom’s happy to join her in having a fresh grad to do her make-up instead.

I was of the opinion ‘go for it’, I mean it can’t get any worse considering what they normally get. So she agreed and said, ‘that’s right, it’s not like I’m the mother of the bride, simpler is ok.. If you get married, then I will do a proper one.. or not, up to you, if you get married, I’m happy to just go to church and haleluyah.’ I see how desperate she is. Hahha.

At one point when we’re chatting while I was dyeing her hair, we came to talk about death. She said she never thinks about death, it is something everyone has to go through. That’s interesting, since everyone needs to go through it, shouldn’t it be something we give more thoughts to than not? In any case, given the current COVID-19 situation, I think it will cross people’s minds more frequently than normally is. That’s not a bad thing.

My cousin’s wedding

It is a good idea that we had the pre-wedding dinner the day before at the hotel, overnight stay at the hotel, wedding day bride fetching from hotel level 10 to hotel level 11, the tea ceremony, the holy matrimony and the wedding reception all at the same hotel. Given the traffic in Jakarta, that’s the wise thing to do!

Here’re some photos –